Jeremy from Melbourne Lefty, who is not my homosexual love toy, despite rumours to the contrary, like a true dope-peddling lefty has gotten me hooked on an online political simulation called "Jennifer Government".
No, it has nothing to do with the Babysitter's Club.
Instead, it is a quite enjoyable and highly addictive simulation of a nation which you create and administrate. The field is wide open ideologically and economically, and you can impliment those policies you want, be a sap and join the UN if you want, or just go it alone and build a powerhouse of a nation like I have.
But let's look at Jeremy's utopia first, shall we? It's quite revealing, I think.
First, the positive aspects. Although I think it is primarily due to the fact that he created his nation before I did mine, he has a slightly higher population at present. It is a very safe place, where prisons are unknown and it's compassionate yet fiercely patriotic (?) people roam free in a permanent state of bliss.
That's right, his people are androids. Not human beings.
Now the downside. Like most attempts to create a social utopia on this planet, Jeremy has foisted a massive and "omnipresent" government on his people, which costs them a whopping 78% annual income tax. Beastiality is legally permissable, it seems, and the right of poor, innocent animals not to be raped by insane humans are not a great concern of this 'humane' government.
You cannot make a racist remark in Jeremyworld, or you go to jail. That's right, it's law. So all those homeboys who refer to each other as 'nigga', and the entire Japanese (who are the most racist people in the world, by the way) population would have been in the jails that don't exist long, long ago.
Lastly , the point that crime does not exist in this leftyloopyland is again reinforced, probably so as to make its citizens feel better about their political freedom rating, which is currently set at "Some".
Are you beginning to see my point here? Jeremy's world functions purely because it is a simulation. It can't account for human beings, because where it is inherently rational, we are inherently irrational. I don't care what kind of society you create. So long as you populate it with real human beings, there will always be crime. Especially if you take away 78% of what they earn!
If you give people too much freedom, they start to have sex with animals (that much at least is accurate). If you curtail their speech, however, you have eaten away at the political freedoms that have taken us 2,000 years to achieve. Jeremy's utopia ought to be a wild area of uncontrollable anarchy is the fact that it is only a simulation.
And that's the problem with leftism in general. It does not allow for a truly pragmatic understanding of human nature. It pines for a utopia that will never, ever exist. It's naive folly.
Now, look at my achievable, pragmatic nation. Civil Rights are as good as Jeremy's nation, my economy is beating all hell out of his, and my people enjoy a level of political freedom that his serfs can only dream of at the end of a long day shovelling shit.
The income tax is set at a reasonable 9%, and I levy more from those who can cope with it. Because my folks know that the world is a shitty place filled with ruthless nasty bastards (like their ruler) they all serve in the military.
So, essentially, I have the best of both worlds, within a reasonable, believeable framework. There is crime, but I'll have anyone doing it slapped into servitude.
You know, now that I think of it, we could use those surplus criminals as colonists.
What, you didn't hear? My lead armoured divisions just crossed the MelbLefty border, and are currently moving unopposed towards the capital. Within the week Jeremy's nation will be pacified, and death squads will deal with any peaceful dissenters. Within a month they will all be good little Sarmizagethusians.
Welcome to the real world, President Jeremy! Enjoy the show trial!