I agree with most of what the woman below says. I certainly never even think of asking a woman to pay. The big exception is her liking for expensive restaurants. I find that the more expensive the restaurant, the worse the service.
I get best service in ethnic restaurants (Vietnamese, Korean, Indian etc) plus more varied and interesting food. And I nearly always take women to such places. And I avoid snooty women that way too
A small caveat perhaps: The only women I get on with are highly intelligent so maybe they are more aware of what really matters rather than being distracted by superficialities. I have NEVER taken my very bright present girlfriend to anything fancy. We met in a suburban coffee lounge. She has a degree in mechanical engineering from the University of Belgrade!
See her below
1. Understand the Economics of Dating: 50/50 is a fallacy, and the reason is simple math:
A woman's 50% share is not a man's 50% share because, on average, women make less per dollar in salary. On average, a woman of my genetic background makes 60 percent of every man's dollar. So, if a meal costs 100 dollars, and a man asks me to split the bill 50/50, that means that my "$50" expense is equal to $60 of his dollars, and his portion is actually $50. I had to work 40% harder and more hours to earn the same $100 that he makes. The woman pays more with time and money when dates are split 50/50. It is not fair, and it is not equal.
In addition to this, women endure the hidden costs of dating that men take for granted. While men can shower and go, the average woman makes several salon appointments and goes shopping to make herself presentable because we understand that men are "visual creatures."
News flash; women do not roll out of bed looking as we present ourselves on dates. We could show up to dates bare-faced, zits exposed, in sweatpants with armpit hair, and greasy head hair, and crusty feet, but we do not. If we look good, it took lots of silent effort.
Before she even arrives at the date, the woman has likely spent: $350 or more. Here are a few hidden costs of dating for women:
Hair (Blowout): $120
Gel Nail Manicure: $45
Transportation: $40 (Gas and Parking)
Just as men want to be spared the details of our beauty regimens and the associated costs, we would like you to be quiet and swipe the card when the check comes.
Itemizing expenses on a date is in bad taste. Men would cringe to hear: "I paid $120 for my hairstyle. I paid $45 for my gel manicure." etc. We understand this. So, we do not speak on it, however, it is a lot to absorb financially.
Men should understand the economics of dating before asking a woman to pay for her food. Plan so that you do not get "sticker shock." Be kind, considerate, and appreciate the effort she silently put forth into making herself beautiful to you. Pay for the date.
2. Being a Cheapskate Robs You Too
Did you ever notice that you may need to flag the waiter down several times for service when you go to less expensive restaurants? Do you notice that servers in lower-tier restaurants generally do not take pride in their jobs? Do they seem aggravated and have no problem showing their frustration? Maybe the glasses have fingerprints, or the silverware is less than clean. Perhaps the food is still frozen and unevenly cooked. The customer service is lacking because they want to get you in and out.
When you pay more and opt for a more expensive restaurant, the service, the food, and the general experience are better. The servers are more highly compensated. Many are in study to be managers in the hospitality field. They care. The food is fresh and pulled from local farms instead of shipped in frozen containers and microwave heated, then transferred to your plate.
Some men think that getting a woman to “pay her share” or opting for a less expensive restaurant is helping him to save money. It is not. Being cheap robs you too. You get what you pay for. Save money until you can take her somewhere memorable. Who knows, you may have your first food orgasm.
It is also important to note that "home-cooked meals" are creepy first dates. It is very unsafe and grounds for assault or rape. Dates should be public.
If you do your research and ask around, you may be pleasantly surprised by your experience and new opportunities. It will be enjoyable for both of you.
3. Asking a woman to pay for half is immature
I can immediately tell that a man is inexperienced if he does not understand the economics of dating and is a cheapskate. With more years behind me than ahead of me now, I do not have time to entertain inexperience. It is a hard pass for me when a man cannot foot the bill which I can afford on my own.
Even if the date turns out not to be great, please keep in mind that a woman does not owe you sex in exchange for a meal. She does not owe you a relationship either. As mentioned before, she has already paid before showing up. It is a mutual exchange of time and energy, and resources.
Dating is an exercise that should be done in a comfortable, safe environment. In choosing the venue and paying the man is simply facilitating a meeting wherein he and a woman are bargaining their futures together.
Make sure the experience is worth every coin because happiness is priceless.
Do not negotiate the cost or quality of dates. Please do it for her and yourself.
Seize the day!