Jihad on rodents

News.com.au - TEHRAN'S municipal authority has launched a new campaign to control the city's rising population of rats, some of them said to be as big as cats. "It has been decided to bring Tehran's rat population under control by the end of the next Iranian year (March 2012),'' the state-run Iran Daily quoted Hossein Kalkhorani, deputy head of the municipality, as saying. The report said the authorities in Iran's capital kill nearly one million rats each year, but despite that the number of the rodents roaming the city has been increasing.
Perhaps the rat population is increasing because word is out, among the vermin that is, about who is ruling the joint and the rats want to join their ilk, perhaps get some freebies you know. A word of warning to western lefties, you might want to stay away from Iran for now, there's a good possibility you might get caught by the exterminators. Given the rat trouble is increasing, I doubt they have the luxury of targeting just the local rats.

On a side note, I have an idea of how to overthrow the jihadist rats in Tehran, we can use the smaller rats to do our work for us. Instead of loading them B-52s up with smart bombs and all that expensive stuff, just conduct weekly air-drops of cheese and old pork sausages all over Tehran.

The rats will multiply like... well rats, and they'll soon take over the joint and put the mullahs out of business. But if the worst happens and the rats fail us, if they bring dishonor upon their dojo and grand master, if they disgrace their family [I've been watching Japanese Samurai movies OK], it's still alright, we'll just wash our hands of the rats and that'll be that. We can always fall back on the ol' bomb-bomb-Iran!


  1. We could always borrow an idea that the British thought up during WWII:

  2. Good idea, but it's expensive and the logistics of wiring up all those rats.

    I'm still thinking the air drops of cheese and ol pork sausages. :)


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