Just Die Already

Another one from Michael Cooper that I just had to share - T.

Here's a list of the top 12 types of people who need to get off the planet, now. Please just fucking die already....

12) Anyone who uses the term "Carbon Footprint," "Global Footprint," or just plain "Footprint." Christ, give it a rest....

11) Dishonest, pro-illegal alien racists who use the phony argument that deporting these shitbags will "split up their families" (while also telling us sob stories about how Hector had to leave his wife and eight of his fifteen kids back home in Guatemala).

10) Journalists who write reports about how men will soon become "obsolete" (because cloning technology will make it so that women can have babies by themselves). Give me a fucking break. Women (especially American women) will always need men to support them, open up stuck jar lids, do yardwork, and pretty much run the world. Besides, most American women are totally enamored with criminals, murderers, sex offenders, druggies, shaved head douchebags,
and prison trash. There will always be a need for these people because the demand is so high.

9) Newscasters who roll their "R's" and punctuate their "T's" in order to "properly" pronounce Hispanic names. This was made fun of on SNL about 15 years ago. We're all laughing at you.

8) Any douchebag who has a spider web tattoo on his elbow. Please just kill yourself.

7) Anyone who buys into the lie that martial arts can help a small person beat up someone much bigger than himself. It's total bullshit. What DOES help a small guy beat up a big guy is amateur wrestling (but it's so fucking gay, it's better to just get beat up).

6) Intellectual lightweights who don't "get" Ann Coulter.

5) Dipshit investors who bemoan the fact that Americans learned nothing from the Dot Com bust in the late 90's, even though they themselves are now jumping on the equally fradulent "Green Investment" bandwagon.

4) People who speak with fake Limey accents.

3) Retards who don't speak or read a lick of Chinese (and who have no knowledge of history) who get Chinese tattos or wear "commie fashion" like Che Guevara T-shirts (or the Chariman Mao bag that #%*$ Cameron Diaz carried around in Peru). Here's a clue, dipshits: A red star generally means communism. Duh....

2) Any no-life loser who camps out for days in order to get iPhones, Star Wars tickets, Playstation 3s, or anything else that shut-ins are clamouring for these days.

1) Paul McCartney.

Bingo on number 5!

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